June has arrived and that means the official start of the rainy season which will be with us until the end of October. The rains are welcome as it will cool things off a bit but at times there can be so much rain that things get a bit gloomy.  I figured that we needed a poster boy to represent those depressing days of too much rain so I dug up this photo of Carl, who is a regular customer of the Hang-out.  Carl has been around Angeles City for a long time and his claim to fame is that he "appropriated" a thermometer from the old Clark Hospital when the base was here. You can always meet Carl and a bunch of other interesting folks whenever you visit the Hang-out on Perimeter Road right next to Honey-Kos and Thi-Hi.  Rain or shine this is the place to meet, and if you don't feel too good, well, see Carl, he loves to use that old thermometer, eh, its an oral one not the other!

The elections are over and I am not sure we will know who the new Mayor is before this column goes to print. If there is something definite before I send this off to the webmaster around the 28th of May I will add a few more words here. Whatever the result I do not expect any major changes within the entertainment area but then we will have to wait and see which way the wind will be blowing.

I have to address something that is to be taken very seriously. Guys, when you visit Angeles City and walk around the entertainment area that extends from Friendship to Fields Ave, please, please, do not stop and talk to any Filipino that approaches you and says that he knows you from your hotel or just wants to inform you of a new Club that has opened. They will always be inviting you to go somewhere in a tricycle that conveniently pulls up at his signal. This Filipino will be decently dressed and can speak fluent English but if you get in that tricycle you will be taken to a house in the Marisol Subdivision which is located just over the Abacan bridge and then you will find yourself in a card game in which you will be hustled for a lot of money. There are many stories that I could relate but believe me, these guys are slick and they use fear tactics to get money out of you. I have written about this before and it was a big objective of the ACTA Tourist Police to get rid of these crooks on Fields Ave. We did have success in getting them out of the area but they moved along Perimeter Road and also in the Diamond area but the Tourist Police kept after them. Regretfully, since the Tourist Police were assimilated into the PNP as Police Aides and their numbers reduced we are now witnessing an upsurge in this activity and it does not appear that the police are doing much to go after these "crocodiles". The police know who they are, they have photographs of them and they know where the houses are that they use for their scam. The Tourist Police also have a file of photographs on their computer and victims have identified the culprits. They work on fear and in the past they have never physically harmed anyone but, last month one victim who tried to get away from the house he was taken to had a gun pulled on him as he tried to get out of the locked gate. They are getting more brazen and more dangerous and the perception is that some police may be protecting them because otherwise, it would be very easy to put them out of business. Some victims who were willing to go to the police found that the police response was very lukewarm with little or no investigation. These recent incidents have been reported to the City Director and ACTA has appealed to him for some aggressive actions in cleaning up this threat to tourists and residents alike. There should be a zero tolerance towards these cowards who prey on innocent tourists and paint a negative picture of Angeles City. Most hotels have warning notices posted about this scam but one victim relayed to me that he had been warned about this scam by a friend the day before. Despite this warning, he was hung over a bit the next morning and went out on an errand for his wife and fell for the scam because his brain was still a bit fizzled in the morning and he just forgot the warning until it was too late. This subject will be taken up with the new Mayor and the City Director as soon as all this election hype dies down and business returns to normal. Meanwhile, Guys, be careful, be alert and do not fall for this scam and do not carry more money with you then you need for one particular day. These Filipino guys that "know you" are evil scumbags so just keep on walking away and do not converse with them at all. By the way, the tricycles they use usually never have a license plate attached. If you are victimized report directly to the PNP Tourist Police Aide office at 151 Fields Ave or call 625-9999 BEFORE going to a police station. If you are dropped at your hotel in order for you to get more cash for money you supposedly owe, once inside the hotel notify the management and call the Tourist Police hot-line. Angeles City is a great safe place to visit as long as you are forewarned of some of the pitfalls that could cause you a lot of trouble.

BLUE BOY NEPOMUCENO WINS THE RACE FOR ANGELES CITY MAYOR! 

On 1 Jul 07 Carmelo Lazatin will step down as Mayor of Angeles City and we will be greeting our new Mayor, Blue Boy Nepomuceno.  Those of us in the entertainment business have had many good years under the leadership of Mayor Lazatin and over the years we have watched this City grow.  We are all anxious to meet the new Mayor and listen to his plans for the future of Angeles City as he will be guiding us through this economic boom that is taking place not only in Angeles City but the whole of Northern Luzon.

Already I have heard rumors of what may or may not take effect on Fields Ave and Perimeter Road.  Some are positive rumors and some are negative.  To all the naysayers I say, "wait and see"and be ready to support Blue Boy who is a very experienced politician who will no doubt work hard to continue theeconomic growth of this area.

The Club owners are wondering what policies will be forthcoming in regards to entertainment.  Will we be able to continue with our lovely dancers as shown on the left or will we have to live with a new look as shown on the right?  We are all keeping our fingers crossed that beauty, and not the beast, will survive.

TIDBITS

Folks, I just had to extract this from the AC Board because it is a test in patience that, for sure, I would have failed!  Thank you "Roadslut" for a true reality that has to be shared with everyone who might be thinking of traveling with Cebu Pacific!

Just last week I had to fly to Hong Kong on business so with Philippine airlines full on that day and Cathay Pacific having 1 flight full and another cancelled (don't know why) I reluctantly chose Cebu Pacific..here is how the story goes...
 
I'm booked on the 4.40pm flight Manila to Hong Kong.. ok no problems so far.. I arrive at Manila airport Sunday April 29 at 2pm to check in only to be told..."sir we are sorry but our flight is 50% over booked and we are going to have to divert the remaining passengers through Cebu to Hong Kong.. 

ah..ok not too bad I guess..extra 2 hours flying..i can live with that..so at our own cost..(Cebu Pacific refused) we all made our way over to the domestic terminal to board our rebooked flight to Cebu at 5.40 pm which is due to arrive in Cebu at 6.50 pm and the flight to Hong Kong departs Cebu at 9.15 pm...plenty of time in a normal country with a normal airline.  Well I'm checked in at the domestic terminal awaiting to board at 5pm when it reaches 5.40pm and still no announcement to board..its now 6pm and still not boarding and no announcement so I wandered over to the control room where they make announcements and asked "what's happening with the Cebu flight?"...I get this reply from the girl ""my god I forgot to announce the delay...Im in trouble now..i will do it now sir..sorry for that".  (ugh..she FORGOT!)  The announcement is now being heard -
"We regret to inform u that the 5.40 pm flight to Cebu will be delayed and boarding will commence at 6.20pm" ..ok so now our arrival in Cebu is 7.30pm..
 
Still no problems..plenty of time to make the connection..tick tick tick...well u guessed it 6.20pm passes and NOTHING WALA..over to the girl at the control room again and this time she is crying..I ask her about the further delay with the Cebu flight and she starts whimpering...I'm too shy to announce a further delay sir..Im sorry."  Between tears and sobbing I was able to get the information from her..the scheduled 5.40 pm flight to Cebu will now depart a 7.40pm.  ummm ..that only leaves 25 mins to transfer and connect to the Hong Kong flight..not enough time..so I go in search of a supervisor...

Now if any of u guys have ever attempted to locate a airline supervisor in the Philippines when there are flight delays u will know its virtually impossible as they go underground or if they are actually a supervisor, they will not admit it, thats exactly what was happening here..bingo..I find one..Mr JUHN AGRILLO..airline ramp controller for Cebu pacific in manila...I tell him my dilemma that I need to connect with the Hong Kong flight from Cebu following the overbooking of the manila - Hong Kong flight at the directions of Cebu pacific and after he views my new ticket issued over at the international terminal he swings into action...well at least I thought he did..he was on his two way radio and then frantically on his cell phone for about 20 minutes then he reaches for his ball pen and makes some notes on my ticket..he stated to me that there will be no problem with the connection as the aircraft being used for the Manila-Cebu flight is the same aircraft to be used for the Cebu- Hong Kong flight and with that he made arrangements for my 2 bags to be re-tagged to go direct transfer to Hong Kong and gave me the luggage tags..in addition he said a airline representative will meet 17 passengers in Cebu and escort them through immigration and back onto the flight in Cebu..

Well I'm impressed and very professionally done, so I thought.. I WAS SO VERY WRONG!  One thing I forget to remember was where I was..The PHILIPPINES where telling lies are a past time...u will understand what I mean soon.

Ok, we are now boarding the flight and arrive at Cebu at 8.45 pm and was told the Hong Kong flight was to be delayed until 9.30 pm as its required, for safety purposes that a 45 minute turn around for a aircraft is required by aviation law..ah..ok 45 minutes should still not be a problem as the international terminal in Cebu is right next door to the domestic with only a glass door separating them..ok out of the aircraft and u guessed it - nothing ..no one to meet us and no one knew anything about 17 passengers connecting to Hong Kong and being diverted by the airline itself due to the overbooking of the manila - Hong Kong flight...no one contacted anyone..it seems our little supervisor in Manila was talking to himself on his cell phone when he was supposedly arranging the connecting passengers to be escorted to the Hong Kong flight out of Cebu and nothing had been arranged and no one contacted in Cebu about this.  Frantically, we had Cebu Pacific staff running in all directions until finally at 9.15 all 17 passengers had been issued boarding passes and all luggage (as I said before) was in transit transferring direct to Hong Kong so there would be no delays to all of us as we would be whisked away to immigration..RIGHT?  WRONG!  Remember that glass door I mentioned that separates domestic from international?  Well its only allowed to be used by airline staff so we had to be escorted out of domestic, walk up the ramp and in through to the International terminal..

We reach the front door to the International terminal to find no one at the xray screening...seems they went to eat..so, more time was wasted until an x-ray guy was finally located..asleep, in the room beside the x-ray machine..ok we are all through the x-ray and up to immigration..everybody is relieved a little..but wait...whats this...Immigration is closed as it being the last international flight out all the immigration staff had gone home..
well now its total chaos with all Cebu Pacific staff including the head supervisor yelling and screaming at everyone until finally an immigration officer appeared from a room dressed in street clothes...luckily for us he was getting changed and ready to go home...ok, we are very quickly through immigration when all of a sudden some dick head filipino passenger yells out.."Hey we haven't paid our Filipino travel tax and there is no one at the counter" ..all stop .. now this is the Philippines...right?  We all know that money is paramount here so it was decided that the head supervisor would collect the 1620p from the Filipino passengers and pay it tomorrow..now this should not have affected the 4 foreign passengers as we are not required to pay that tax and when I mentioned this to the supervisor so he could allow us to go straight to the plane..he abruptly said "NO..everybody stays until the money is paid!"..Ok its 9.35 pm..5 mins past departure time and we are finally being escorted to the air bridge where the plane SHOULD BE only to find the air bridge operater and a official of Cebu Pacific walking towards us with a surprised look on their faces.. yes guys... u guessed it...the plane had already left and was taxiing out onto the runway... a heated argument started between the 2 head airline staff to a point of almost a fight... meanwhile there are 17 passengers all standing here watching the greatest debacle of this century unfold..apparently the head supervisor who was with us through the entire check in and Immigration process FORGOT (there is that magic filipino word again) to inform the air bridge controller and the other head supervisor of the connecting 17 passengers so he cleared the plane to leave..

Can u believe this so far..im sitting here pissing myself laughing about all this now but wait...its not finished yet,,the saga continues..
 
After everything calmed down I asked the supervisor who cleared the plane for departure...."did u not notice 17 passenger names on the flight manifest were not on board when u had the captain and the head flight attendant sign off on the passenger manifest...of coarse....just a blank stare and no comment.  I further asked..."are u aware that there is unaccompanied luggage on board that aircraft?"  Now his eyes light up and he immediately contacted the control tower and the tower contacted the captain who at this point was still waiting to take off when all of a sudden the two way radio lights up and the guy in the control tower relays the captains response..this is unbelievable.. the captains response was.."thats bad luck for them passengers...this flight is already delayed and I'm not coming back to the terminal as I want to be on time for the return flight from Hong Kong..I will notify ground staff at Hong Kong and have the luggage held there.."  now the captains name was obtained by me for follow up legal matters along with a detailed complaint to the airline..the captains name is:
 
 CAPT. VINCENTE.G.CASIBANG II
 A320 CAPTAIN
 CEBU PACIFIC AIR
 
Ok -  plane gone...nothing could be done and we have two supervisors tearing each other apart..what a nightmare..ok it continues..so now its calmed down a little but many problems still exist.  Walking back towards Immigration I realize that we all have already been stamped out of the country and as I was right that the Immigration officer had left already..so the cell phones of both supervisors go into overtime trying to find out what to do about all this...and while we were waiting for a Immigration answer the funniest thing I have seen for a long time was 13 Filipinos trying to get their 1620p travel tax back from one of the supervisors...no Filipino wants to part with money already in his pocket and I was certain that money was never destined for the travel tax department...eventually he gave in and handed back all the money when along comes a well dressed Filipino in a suit and takes the two supervisors aside for a little heart to heart chat...yeah right..the supervisors, under the instruction from this guy, left and were not seen again that night..
 
ok this guy seems to be from the top of the Cebu Pacific food chain and starts apologizing and says we have all been re booked on tomorrow nights flight and told us to all go and come back tomorrow night...  so ok ....I ask who will pay for our accommodation tonight as all of us had flown from manila on request from cebu pacific,, his answer was no surprise – “that’s your problem sir..we are not responsible...now everyone must leave the terminal or security will be called”... ok fine with me I say but...now you are instructing people to enter the Philippines illegally as we have not been processed by immigration to re enter the Philippines….his answer...again.. “not our responsibility sir...now will u all please leave and come back tomorrow night” .... with that he left.  Now picture this.. 17 passengers inside a international terminal with no sign of any staff anywhere... I just had to laugh as I left the terminal and headed for a bar to get drunk... what everyone else did... I DONT KNOW..
 
Anyhow, to finish off....yes I got to Hong Kong the next night but wait...where is my luggage?.. hehe...u guessed it…. they sent it back to Cebu on that same return flight...and yes it was there when I returned... Now I ask u - could anyone dream up such a story?..
 
My complaint was issued to the management of Cebu Pacific yesterday morning and the return email response I got was just as I expected….. It was a copy of the terms of carriage of the airline..

 “FLY CEBU PACIFIC AT YOUR OWN RISK" – (Holy horseshit, how the heck did Roadslut have so much patience and then be able to laugh about it later?  I won’t say I will never fly Cebu Pacific but for sure, only if I really have to and then I will never forget this story). 

Lets see, this is June which is not that far away from Mark Smith's Roadhouse Christmas in August fund raiser for the Bahay Bata Street Children Center.  This is a very worthy project that brings local expats and tourists together to raise money that is sorely needed to meet the operating costs of the Center.  So, this is a teaser announcement to get you thinking about it early.  Naturally I will be mentioning it in my Jul column as well.  It will be held on the first Saturday of August and folks, it is a fun filled evening as only Mark is capable of putting on.  He gets a lot of support from some key folks that never look for any publicity but they are known by many of us here in town and their efforts are appreciated.  Some of the great raffle prizes are a color TV, motorcycle, four SEAIR tickets to Boracay, washing machine and a Sony video camera.  Let me use a few extra words to throw a few accolades to the SEAIR management team.  This company supports the local community in so many ways and I salute Ken and Gus of SEAIR who go the extra mile to personally attend the many events they support.  OK, enough extra words, just remember ROADHOUSE CHRISTMAS IN AUGUST.

WHAT'S HAPPENING IN JUNE - My friend Mark (Pegleg) told me that some folks commented that I am always writing about events that have already taken place and there is no advance news about upcoming happenings.  Well, that is because many of the bar owners do not pass the info on to me in advance and also because some events are planned only a week or two before the actual event and too late for me to include in this column.  But, I have appealed to many of the owners to try and keep me advised of future events so I can keep the readers advised and also provide the event hosts a bit of free publicity.  Not sure how successful it will be because it all depends on the folks providing me the information.

1 June -    Official opening of Apartelle Mirage and also 1st Anniversary of the Typhoon Club

5 June -     Dog House @ Cherry's Club

12 June -   Dog House @ Blue Nile Exec. Club

19 June -   Dog House @ Rhapsody Club

26 June -   Dog House @ Blue Nile Club

ACRSL Activities:  5 Jun - 1400 hrs - Brass Knob Social; 12 Jun - 1400 hrs - Ponderosa Social; 18 Jun - 1130 - Roy's Pub Committee Mtg.

30 June - Blind Draw Doubles Dart Tournament @ the Blue Boar Inn.  Registration starts at 7 PM, game on 8 PM Sharp.  Entry P300 only.

NOTE:  There was a special unique fund raiser for the Bahay Bata Children's Center on 26 May.  Regretfully, I did not get the information in time to post in my May column.  I thought maybe some of you would still like to donate for a good cause after the fact.  If so, log on to www.pidonations.com and get some info and history on the fund raiser.  This event is conducted once a year and attendance is limited.  The next time you come to the Philippines please contact me at my stable if you would like to visit the Children's Center.

There is a new business that has just opened up called "Urban Home SPA" which offers legitimate 24-hour home service massage.  There are 7 various massages offered to include body scrub with milk and salts and foot scrub.  Prices range from P250 to P1,000 depending on which massage you choose.  For service and more information call 626-0319 or 0928 505 0545. 

Got the word from our good friends at Limited Edition which is closed for renovations that it will reopen as a restaurant featuring the menu that used to be served at the very popular Powder Keg.  The opening is still about three months away but it is nice to know that another eatery will be available and we will be thanking Dave Crowe for making available the Powder Keg menu items.  I am becoming hungry just thinking about the great specials I used to eat at the Powder Keg and I hope that Bill will keep the prices at a reasonable level. 

My dart playing friend from Olongapo, Ron C., wrote and told me that on his recent trip to Angeles City he encountered a couple of problems.  While driving on base he missed a red light and was pulled over the the CDC cops and told that he had a choice.  Report to the CDC police office and wait two hours to pay a P200 fine or give the cop P500 and be on his merry way.  He opted for the P500!  Then later in the day a young Filipina couple (teenagers) tried to get into his wife's pocketbook while they were shopping at the SM Mall.  He tells me that the next time he comes to Angeles City he will hire a driver and a bodyguard.  I don't believe that but for sure, he did have an interesting day at the base and at SM.  Advice, do not violate traffic rules on Clark as the CDC cops do catch quite a few folks.  As far as SM is concerned, well, welcome to the club Ron, so many have lost money to pickpockets there that I think it serves as a pickpocket school for aspiring thieves and that the lowlifes engaging in that activity get a certificate of completion from the head security guy at SM. 

Word of advice to all Club and Hotel managers, do NOT entertain a customer named Thomas Thorpe, American as he is quite an unstable, violent individual who will try to stay at a hotel, drink at a club and eat at various locations and run out on paying a bill.

NAME ON THE MAP

Hey, I got another name posted on my map.  John Ward from Port Pirie, South Australia stopped by my stable with his girlfriend Ethel to show me where Port Pirie is located.  Bob is a Rotarian in Port Pirie and is also into scuba diving.  When in AC he attends the weekly meetings of the Clark Centennial Rotary and always takes the time to visit the Bahay Bata Street Children's Center.  Will John eventually retire here in AC?  He told me that he has 10 more years to think about it.  What about Ethel heading to Australia?  Well, somehow I think it won't take John 10 years to figure out the answer to that question.

A BIT OF ENTERTAINMENT

Every time I pass the Anchorage Inn I see these worn out old Hashers sitting outside (OK, some are young) gossiping over a continuous flow of beer and watching the ladies go by.  Quite often I stop to have a bit of a chat because they are a bunch of good lads and maybe I can pick up a bit of gossip.  But, one night on one was sitting outside!  I was shocked and worried - did someone die?  Was someone having a heart attack?  I looked in the window and saw everyone inside laughing and having a good ole time and in the back there were two lads singing some songs and chatting it up with the on-lookers.  It was "Hooray" Howard McKay and others enjoying an evening of folk, rock and comedy.  I went inside and was disappointed when I realized I was too late and only was able to enjoy the last few minutes of the "act".  Now I am waiting for the next show but regretfully, no one knows when it will be.  It is all a bit spontaneous but if possible I will try to see if they can give me a date for the next event.  Howard must be putting on a good show if it gets all those lads off their duffs in front of the place.  I better not say too much or they might think of charging an admission price.  By the way, seating is limited. 

HEY JOE!

His name is definitely not "Joe" but he is the author of the popular "Hey Joe" books that have been around for quite a few years.  His name is really Ted Lerner and he is currently working on another book that should be published soon.  I happen to run into Ted one night just down the street from Sub Delicious and what caught my eye was the outlandish shorts he was wearing and then I was surprised to see those shorts inhabited by Ted who was out with his charming wife Aurora.  Now Ted is not only an author but a well known sports announcer here in the Philippines and is well acquainted with our aging but dynamic international referee Bruce McTavish.  I told Ted that I figured that his shorts must have been made from one of Bruce's discarded referee shirts.  He and his wife did not hit me but took it all in the good humor it was meant.  I don't know how many folks have had the opportunity to meet Ted but if you see him around, run up and say "Hey Joe" then get him to tell you a few of the hundreds of stories of his experiences in the Philippines.  He is a fabulous raconteur of Philippine tales, especially the one's he does not put in his books.  Oh yes, all he wants for Christmas and birthdays are some decent shorts!

SEVEN MONTHS AND COUNTING

I wonder if I could get Troy (past manager of Treasure Island) to take odds on the Subic-Clark Toll Road being open on time?  From what I read the Japanese contractor is experiencing a 14% slippage in the schedule.  Of course there are a bunch of reasons being put forward for the slowdown but the Philippine President has demanded that the project be completed on time.  One thing is for sure, the landscape of Clark from the Friendship area to the OMNI site has certainly changed.  I wanted to take a bunch of pictures but it is difficult to stop to try to get the good shots that would give you a good idea of what is happening.  The two I am including here were taken just before the Friendship gate and it might give you a bit of an idea of what is going on but I will try and get some more.  It is one hell of a project and it will certainly bring the Subic Free Port and the Clark Freeport closer together in cooperation and travel time.  Now, if we could only get EO 500B signed so that Clark can enjoy an open skies policy and if the new Mayor would only do something about improved infrastructure within Angeles City itself then Angeles City would really take off with business investments and increased tourism.  For the life of me I can't figure out why the traffic mess on McArthur and along Fields Ave at the checkpoint area can't be improved.  Regretfully, when the CDC group under Dr. Angeles tore down all the illegal stalls along the checkpoint area they did not look at improving the traffic flow.  With no consideration for the City they just decided to rebuild the stalls and then allow some chosen favorites to get leases at a low price which they then sublet at much higher prices.  Fair enough, but instead of widening Fields Ave they created a damn big mess which is controlled by Jeepney and tricycle drivers.  Lets wait and see what new ideas come from the new administration.  How many people want to bet that nothing changes traffic wise?  Troy, what odds are you giving?

THE BUTTERFLY ROCK

It has been over a year since I stopped by the Butterfly Rock to check out Nikko and gang and I was pleased to see, that as usual, the place was "Rockin" with a large crowd on hand drinking, playing pool and just having a good time.  Nikko was at his usual table enjoying a few drinks with his mates and a more jovial host you will never find.  It was an enjoyable hour or so for me as I knew a lot of the customers that were in attendance and that always makes a night out that much more fun.  The operating hours are from 1400 to 0300 daily with a happy hours starting at 1400 hrs and ending at 2000 hrs (local drinks P45) and after 2000 hrs the price goes to P65 which is reasonable since most of the other clubs charge P85.  I managed to get a picture of a few of his dancers who did not mind providing a happy pose for the readers of this column.  Seeing the "Black Widow" brought back pleasant memories of the many times I watched her play pool for Nikko's teams over the years and believe me, she can kick some butt.  She is a personable lady and one you would enjoy playing pool with because she brightens up the place.  When in town, make the effort to turn the corner right after passing the Roadhouse (or before) and check out Nikko and his fun place, I'm pretty sure you will enjoy yourself.

After I left The Butterfly I stopped next door to sit and chat with Don, the owner of "Barhoppin" and ended up staying longer than I intended.  Don was sitting at his outside table with "Roadslut" and I enjoyed the conversation so much that I could not get off my ass to leave.  Of course both Don and Roadslut bought me drinks so the incentive to stay was there.  Now, the picture of the girl to the right is of Marisa, an old friend of Don's that happened to ride up while we were talking.  I was told that she will be heading to Australia soon but I took her picture because she looked good and she displayed a high degree of intelligence when after five minutes of conversation with Roadslut she declared him to be "Bastus" or just plain nasty!  I kept my mouth shut as she might have decided I was just an old "asshole".  This was one sharp lady!

WE LOVE ANGELES CITY

So says Vince Mangia (Raleigh, North Carolina and Mark Stutsman (St Louis), one a retired Navy man and the other who is still working.  Now, how the heck does a lad from North Carolina and one from St. Louis get together in my stable?  It is just one of those Angeles City things where it is easy to see old friends who travel here to enjoy our exotic life style.  I could tell when talking to them that they are definitely folks that look forward to their visits to this location.  They enjoyed many of the Clubs in town but gave high fives to The Club, Roadies and the Bedrock and that indicates how extensive their barhopping was.  It seems that Roadies is becoming the Club to go to when venturing off of Fields Ave.  As Vince would probably say, "You all come back now, you hear".

Here are a few words I received from Mark (right in picture) after his visit to Angeles City:

Hey Harry,

Here's the pictures I took of us and the signs of your place when I was there in AC late last month, thought you might like to see them. I tried the SOS there at the Blue Boar, it's GREAT!!!!!, be happy to come back and try it again my next trip. Never did make it to Klub Klass, that will have to be on my "Things to do" list for next trip also. Thanks again for sending us over to the Sydney Hotel, we really enjoyed our stay there......... Take Care and I'll catch you later......... Mark (thanks for the words Mark.  Glad you liked the SOS, I had a few good ole Southern boys help me with the recipe.  Glad you enjoyed the Sydney Hotel, I usually recommend that hotel when I am full at the Hotel La Casa.  Looking forward to seeing you again, the SOS is waiting for you)

TOURISTS OF THE MONTH

I sure would be hard put to figure out which area in Australia has the most fun loving, hard drinking, good old boys that just want to enjoy life both at home and especially when they come to Angeles City.  I have met so many from that very large country and have found that so far, each and every one has been top notch.  Now I know that every country has their share of miscreants and I have met a few, but so far all those who have stopped by my stable to say hello have been top drawer lads, especially those from down under.  So, of course, I was quite pleased to drop down to my bar one morning to greet five lads from Sydney Australia (Coogie Boys) who managed to get away from their wives for a short holiday.  From left to right we have John, Robert, Peter, Derek (the bachelor) and Peter (Blakey).  They were here for six days and then were heading for Vietnam and while here were all well behaved, except for Derek who was not tied down by a wedding ring.  I did hear something about some lady named Cristina that continuously gives Robert a hard time and has been stringing him along for 5 years (the lady sitting next to Robert).  That just doesn't sound very fair to me.  It seems their favorite drinking Club was the Blue Nile and they sure did hate to leave Angeles City but they were a bit excited about having the opportunity to check out Vietnam.  I guess by now they are all back in Sydney and the married ones no doubt will have to wait a few years before they permission for a return trip.

I WOULD IF I COULD (#1)

OK guys, I am going to be up front with you and explain why I put the #1 in the title.  It is because I broke a couple of my rules here in that I look for someone really spectacular, sexy and no children to be my lady of the month.  I do not always succeed in filling all the requirements and in this case I decided that I must continue my research for this month.  This lady, Mary, works at the "Bar Hoppin" Club and she caught my eye when I was sitting outside talking to Don.  She is 31 years old and has five, repeat FIVE kids.  Without thinking I asked her "how many fathers?".  She laughed instead of getting insulted and told me only one but I guess he got worn out from making all those kids and he skipped out on her.  So, she is a bit older and has a bunch of kids but is kind of sexy when you see and talk to her but I know you guys expect something better from me so I will try to continue my research, time permitting.  It is a very difficult task that takes time, cooperation from the managers and the girl I want to photograph.

Meanwhile, back to Mary!  She is from the Visayas, likes music and dancing.  Obviously she likes a bit of time in bed as well and is fertile as hell.  Now Mary would be an ideal mate for some senior guy that would like to find a steady, reliable, personable partner and has enough money to feed five rugrats as well.  You could go to being a lonely old sexually frustrated divorced man or one who has lost his spouse due to illness to one with a happy family with five kids that would adore you and a woman grateful as hell to meet that guy who loves her for herself, despite the baggage she brings to a relationship.  A thirty one year old woman is not old and would be ideal for those 60, 70, 80 old guys looking for companionship.  Quick, buy your plane tickets, get on over here, check out Bar Hoppin and latch on to Mary before she is scooped up by someone.  This is a hot ticket, it is sort of like buy one - get five.  Meanwhile, I have to move my ass to do a bit more "research".

I WOULD IF I COULD (#2)

It was not easy gang.  I searched high and low looking for my second choice, in and out of Clubs, walking the streets, sweating, worrying, wondering if I would be successful.  My legs were hurting, my back hurt, my shoulder hurt, my money was dwindling but then, at last, just in time to save me from a heart attack (doesn't this sound dramatic!) I found my inspiration at the Stampede.  That damn Jimbo always seems to have some great looking women employed and he always knows who to lead me to.  This time, I spied the lady first and she met ALL my qualifications.  She is single, 19 years old, no boyfriend and no kids.  Great personality, attractive, good figure, good communicator and could be a star in any wet dream of your choice.  Her name is Liza, from Samar and is a high school graduate.  She has five sisters and one brother and she has a dream.  She would like to to be able to go to college and study management or if that is unattainable, at least attend a care giver course.  The ideal man of her choice would be one between 30 and 40 years of age but I am sure that could be negotiable.  Like most of the girls I interview her hobbies are dancing and singing but no doubt with her ambitions a few more hobbies could be added.  You know, every time I ask about a hobby no one ever says "cooking" but a few do mention reading.  No doubt some lucky guy will be able to interest Liza in a few hobbies she has not even thought of yet, like, eh, photography?
Dear readers, no doubt you have noticed that my tastes lean towards slim women with pretty faces.  Now, I have noticed that nearly every club has some dancers on the heavy side so maybe once in a while I will try to feature some with a bit of excess meat on them.  What do you think?

SHARPEN UP THOSE DARTS

Obviously Tony and John do not look as good as the ladies above but they are two excellent dart players that practice hard for the monthly dart tournament held at the Hotel La Casa/Blue Boar Inn every last Saturday of the month.  Recently Tony (red shirt) took had a 101 out by throwing a single 17, double 17, double bull out which was a great accomplishment for a non-professional dart player.  The format of the tournament is blind draw doubles, two out of three games of cricket and 501 with, if necessary, the third game up to the winner of the cork.  The entry fee is P300 with all money out, small trophies for first and second place teams.  Registration starts at 7 PM and game on at 8 PM sharp.  It is an open tournament open to all comers to include the ladies.  The venue is excellent with four well lighted dart boards and you get two chances as we feature a losers bracket.  Come on out and join John and Tony but watch out for "double bull" Tony as he is ready to kick some butt! (The next tournament will be on 30 Jun)

THE EUROPEAN RESTAURANT

I am going to introduce you to a small, friendly restaurant that most tourists will not be aware of because it is off the well worn beaten track where all the clubs and restaurants are easily found.  This place, owned by Koert, from Holland is becoming well known in the expat community as a place to go for some fine European dishes at very reasonable prices.  How about a delicious tenderloin steak with salad and French fries for only P290 pesos, or maybe a basket (6 pieces) of chicken with French fries for P300?  These are only two examples of tasty quality food offered on a very extensive menu.  Looking for breakfast, they open at 0700 hrs and believe it or not they offer 40 different types of pancakes.  My favorite is the "lover girl", #34 on the menu which is pancake with ice-cream topped with strawberry sauce for only P65.  I can't eat that too often or else I would match the size of Koert.  If you want a late dinner, no problem, Koert is on hand until 2200 - 2300 hrs depending on the business.  It is a nice place to sit outside, relax with a cold beer and chat with some of the locals. I notice that when I reread I only commented on the food that sounds more American than European and that must be because I am a Yank.  To be quite honest, I forgot to write down the European offerings so now you will have to go there to find out what they are.  I got carried away reading the different names of the pancakes.  So, where is it located?  Traveling up Perimeter Road from Fields Ave proceed until you get to "C" Italian Restaurant and turn left at the corner (Mt. Makiling Street) and it is only a few meters down on the left side, opposite Tamarind Street.  By the way, beer is only P35 and that is a darn good price.

AUSSIE HAVEN

Recently I have heard so many of my Aussie mates, and one Scotchman talking about the great meat pies served up by Ray at his newly opened "Aussie Haven" that I had to stop by and check it out.  I did not have far to go because he is right up the alley from my stable so it only took my feeble legs two minutes to reach the place, well, maybe three minutes if I don't count the time getting down my stairs.  Actually I had received some good reports even before he opened because he was selling his pies out of his house before he started up his business.  The eatery is located on the corner of Santol and Perimeter Roads, #387F Don Juico.  Ray is a busy man as he bakes and cooks up a storm.  I checked out his meat pies and they are delicious but what annoyed me is that he also bakes and sells fruit pies of different flavors, small individual ones for P90 and bigger ones on order for P300 plus.  Why annoyed?  Because I could not resist buying a small cherry pie and then sat there talking so long that his wife arrived with freshly baked lemon meringue pies as well.  I can't resist a lemon meringue pie so naturally I bought one and bugger my cholesterol count.  I also ordered his cinnamon donuts and white bread to be picked up the next morning.  He makes milk shakes, hamburgers, hotdogs, stew, sausage rolls, breakfast, and on and on.  I had to get the hell out of there before I ordered enough to deplete my monthly budget for food.  What made leaving difficult is that Ray is such a nice guy and a pleasure to talk to plus he plays the music of my generation, you know, those oldies but goodies.  Did I mention that I had to order his raisin bread as well?  Yes, he sells a few Filipino dishes as well so you can take your Mrs or girlfriend along with you as you eat up his meat pies.  Maybe he should rename his store "Aussie Heaven" because his creations will make any Aussie feel that he has died and went to heaven.  OK already, a few Yanks as well!

DOOM AND GLOOM

Some "enlightened" foreign resident of Angeles provided the following opinions (I did not correct the misspelled words):

New bar raids on the top bars of angeles right after the elections, agnew was a big lazatin supporter, pissed off nepomuceno. (This statement is so far off the truth that it is riduculous - the Blue Boy camp did not initiate any raids)

vicky vega new vice mayor big time women rights activist and enemy of bars in balibago. she really wants to get at one particular bar owner who has diversified into other businesses smartly, restuarants, hotels, hospitals, and condos. (Gee, I wonder who that is?  Guess I will have to ask Vicky.  Maybe I could ask her to join me for the happy hour at the Roadhouse)

peso is rocketing to the stratosphere, and tour guides are going to reach 1500 peso as they already are in some bars and even higher in other bars based upon a new angeles 3 or 4 tiered system based upon the girls looks, some reach 3,000 or more for the new "ramp model" now your going to have a new pricing system that will be based on if a girl has 1 or 2 kids? how old is she? is she a model? how long she has worked? how many customers she has been with? (Coming from a guy that must not get off Fields Ave too much - P40 to P50 drinks are still available just beyond the "checkpoint".

this shit is out of hand. now they have tiered drinks, drinks for models are higher than ordinary drinks for regular girls, maybe in the future a cherry girls drink will be higher also, beers in some bars cost a double lady drink what the hell is that? if a girl dresses differently than the other girls then that makes her special ryt? most girls have bikinis then some lingerie, then some have a bakla faggot dress them up into a superstar. each one now has there own special price.
sir you can have a hog for 1,000 to 1200
or you can have one 30 pounds less for 2,000
or if you aint cheap and you want what was just a regular girl about 5 years ago for 3,000 or 3,500. (why do you spend so much time in the Doll House?  Go elsewhere)

all this drink teired pricing and barfine pricing is designed for one thing and one thing only. confuse and rip off customers. make people very very confused. because if you dont have one set price for things then that means the girls and mamasans can make their own prices and we all know what that causes, CHAOS and RIP OFFS, years ago when you walked into a bar you know how much the drink was, and how much the lady drink was and how much the tour guide was. you could budget and set aside money for this and that and you could put money for your room and food. (yep, years ago - now, you have to use common sense as to which bar you should frequent - oops, did I say common sense?)

I cant wait till the bar owners in response to the dollar plummeting will raise the prices for drinks to 100 and lady drink to over 200, then they will get what they trully want, more koreans and malaysians, and less westerners. (that could happen, aren't many places charging P85 a drink and P150 for ladies drinks now?)

Now more and more regular expats are up rooting and selling houses and moving to cebu, subic and outside of subic more up north castillejos, san fernando la union, (That's alright, the irregular expats are too drunk to move)

they are not moving to manila. (gee, I wonder why?)
they want more down to earth prices. prices that are closer to what filipinos are paying. A more greener environment and less air pollution than angeles, better schools and better cleaner food markets. foreingers are heading north and west, bataan, la union, zambales, and some south.
is this the emptying out of angeles city taking place? (Sure, and you think you will pay the same prices as Filipinos - good luck?)

NEW CATHOLIC PRIEST GOVERNOR (Was there an old Catholic Priest before the new one?)
NEW mayor in angeles, (What did you expect since the old one could not run anymore, he reached the term limit)
New vice mayor. (That is true, and there is a lot of her to see)

No wonder expats are packing up and leaving because they know something. (yep, some will move and some will stay, so what?)

New dollar rate, New pricing structure trying to be implemented in angeles to disastrous effects. prices of hotels and apartments and houses way over priced. hotels at 5000 to 30,000 a night, apartments for 30,000 a month with 1 year advance, houses for 5 to 10 million pesos. what bullshit. all centered around fields avenue. a strip of land with bars on it that can be ZONED OUT, OUTLAWED, RAIDED OUT, (Gee, what about the ones that still charge far less, like P800 to P2,000 a night and apartments from 10 to 20,000 pesos a month - you pay what you can afford)

If the bars went away would you still be here or come here? (finally, a sensible question - My answer is yes!  First, there will always be bars and if many closed they would be replaced by bigger and better night clubs and those good old side streets would still be around)

Would it be worth it to put up with vendors who call tourists racists and assholes, over priced shitty food establishments, traffic, major break ins and crime and robberys with murder as we have seen and heard of so many times. set ups, SM MALL was supposed to be an oasis but turned into a pick pocketing heaven with foriengers getting robbed, and sm management doing nothing at all about it. (Gee, nothing has changed in 30 years, you are talking about New York, USA right, or parts of Los Angeles?)

or would you just get that someone special who you found and pack up and head off to start a new life somewhere else and see how it works out. thinking anything could be better than the shit hole we just left. (please send me your new address so we can keep in touch - bye-bye)

JOKE - OK, this one made me smile

GASTRONOMIA

It sounds like a stomach ailment but it is the new food retail shop developed by that wild chef, Chris, from "C" Italian Restaurant.  It should be open sometime in June and will feature 200 labels of wine along with various meats such as salamis, hams, cold cuts, homemade Italian sausages, imported US meats from Australia, New Zealand, Italy and hey, how about a bit of ostrich meat as well.  Also offered will be home made pasta, sauces, pasta products and finally, baked European style breads.

So, once again, Chris manages to creep into my column.  I can't keep him out because he keeps coming up with new ideas to compliment his fine dining restaurant.  I guess I will have to get Phillip from the Yats Wine Club to check out Chris's wine offerings and let me know which bottles I can afford.  I did not know that the temperature necessary for storing wine was different for red and white wine.  Between Chris and Phillip I might get educated and switch from drinking coke to wine.  But, it is so much easier with coke because every year is a good year for their blend.  OK guys, only kidding, wine drinkers are so serious!

WELCOME BACK MURPHY

My goodness, one afternoon this rather senior looking gentleman walks into my stable, orders a beer, and as we started chatting I realized he knew a lot of the old history of Angeles City.  I did not recognize the old codger until he gave his name and mentioned "Murphy's Bar".  Holy shit, Leo Murphy has returned to Angeles City.  Murphy, at one time owned the Mustang Ranch, the Oar House, Heartbreak Bar and of course Murphy's.  All popular well known bars that drew one hell of a lot of customers.  No doubt there will be many readers of this column that will remember Murphy.  Where has he been?  Well, for quite a few years he has been living in Thailand where he had a condo but he told me that he decided that he had had enough of Thailand.  It just was not his cup of tea anymore, too many changes and not all for the good so he had to return to the location that was still dear to his heart.  It is always good to see some of the "old-timers" return because they have a lot of memories and great stories of what things were like in Angeles City before Pinatubo.  Come on back to my stable Leo, looking forward to chatting with you again.

THE HAPPY ROCK OPENS

This bar occupies the building that used to be the home of T-Times.  Of course, under it's new owner, it has been renamed, and has undergone a few renovations.  The first impression that strikes you as you enter is that the atmosphere is more charged with personality and fun.  It is a happy place and after a few minutes you realize that the ladies on hand are all happy, friendly, and not bad looking.  For those folks bitching about the prices on Fields Ave, how about local drinks at P50 from opening to closing which is 1400 to 2300 hrs.  The new owner is from New Castle, Australia and he is busy renovating what used to be the 24 hour massage right next door.  In two months it will be home to an internet cafe, pool table, and a small restaurant. Check it out!

MYSTERY BUTT OF THE MONTH

OK, there is no logical reason for me to put this picture in this column other than I feel a figure as nice as this one has to be enjoyed by the masses.  Naturally, I will not tell you were this perfect rump can be found, and for sure it is not at Bretto's, because then it would not be a mystery.  You just have to search for her but I will give you a hint, she cannot be found in any Fields Ave Club.
Now, I do have another reason for using this picture because I want you to be in a good mood when I inform you about the nasty NBI Manila raid on the six clubs under the Blue Nile Group. Yes, once again the peaceful tranquility of Fields Ave was disturbed by money seeking lads in uniform from Manila who enjoy visiting Angeles City and rounding up innocent folks in not too polite a manner at gunpoint.  At 0030 hours, 23 May, heavily armed NBI agents entered, at the same time, Misty's, Blue Nile, Blue Nile Executive Club, Nero's Forum Club, Bedrock Club, and the Camobdia Club.  They were looking for underage girls, drugs and allegations of trafficking of women based on a complaint from an anonymous complainant.  Once in the clubs they prevented all customers and staff from leaving the premises and the customers were kept for three hours as they were asked for ID's and to empty out their pockets.  All in all at least 700 staff were looked at and of that lot they took 238 dancers to Manila for further investigation as well as support staff, Mamasans and two expat managers.  The good news is that after one day all the dancers and most of the staff were released because not one girl could be found to be underage.  The other good news is that our ACTA lawyer, based in Manila tirelessly, for four straight days worked with various officials to secure releases and pursue legal challenges for those staff members that were not released. Folks, this was a massive blanket arrest of 300 personnel with no evidence whatsoever.  Many questions are being asked by the Angeles City Mayor, the City Director, and the ACTA lawyer that to date have turned up many irregularities of NBI procedures.  There have been many rumors, speculations and opinions floated around town on who was behind this raid.  ACTA officers can state without reservation that it was not politically motivated and had nothing to do with the just concluded election in Angeles City.  We may never get to the absolute truth of who initiated the so called "complaint" but you can believe that we will get very close.  Counter actions are being planned that we hope will correct some questionable procedures and may even result in some disciplinary actions being taken against some agents.  Because of the nature of the business on Fields Ave and the "cash cow" perception held by various agencies, raids of this sort have been part of the history of Fields Ave.  In the past it has never been on this large a scale and never on such flimsy allegations.  But the businesses on Fields Ave continue to bounce back from adversity and at least this time we have an organization that has a strong enough voice to be heard and can seek answers and help to restore confidence amongst its members.  We are doing business in a third world country where law and order is not perfect and bumps in the road are often encountered but the businessmen here are a strong lot. When adversity strikes they join together to overcome that adversity.  So after one week, it is business as usual and we have shown the officials that our clubs are complying with all regulations and we hope the "crocodiles" will let us operate peacefully without taking too big a bite out of our efforts.  Everyone, and I mean everyone is doing their best to attract tourists to Angeles City, to include City Hall officials.  Law Enforcement officials from Manila who conduct heavy handed operations like what took place on 23 May do not help the cause.  

THERE IS NO PARTICULAR REASON FOR THE THREE PICTURES HERE OTHER THAN THE FACT THAT JUNE WILL SEE SOME CLOUDY DAYS AND RAIN AND I WANTED YOU TO SEE WHY, IN ANGELES CITY, IT IS ALWAYS A BRIGHT DAY FOR THOSE OF US WHO VISIT AND LIVE HERE.  GENTLEMEN, LIFE IS TOUGH! 

In this time of equal opportunity and political correctness it is now time for us men to remind the women in our lives that it is your turn to wine and dine us for father's day.  Now, we don't need flowers and a fancy dinner, just fix us up with a couple of cases of beer, a deck of cards and have the guys over for a good poker game.  Or better yet, issue a kitchen pass so we can head out for some real serious barhopping in the afternoon and then come home for a good meal cooked up by our loved ones.  Somehow I do not think it will turn out that way and my gut tells me that it will be one of those nice sentimental Sundays with the family.  We have reached the halfway point of 2007 and we have gone through an election and the thrill of watching the dollar slide downward against the peso.  My prediction, P45 to the dollar at the end of the next six months.  We have seen Clark awarded Freeport Zone status and increased budget airline flights into the DMIA.  We have watched people buying up land and properties to usher in a building frenzy of hotels and apartments.  We have bid goodbye to friends and acquaintances that have passed away and caused us to wipe away a tear or two.  We have smiled as we watched weddings and newborns and have taken the time just to appreciate the fact that we are still alive and healthy. There is much more but no one can deny that it has been a rather interesting six months in my town and it is just the beginning.  I will take my tired old butt to bed now as Priscilla the Horse is at the farm with our rugrat and I have stayed up too late as usual.  Remember folks, be kind to horses.